Still Re: And furthermore

13/09/07

“…there are reports coming out of Pucklechurch this morning of a large fanged ferret marauding in a swaggering fashion, stealing hubcabs & scaring old ladies with high pitched renditions of Beatles tunes. A Mrs Trellis, 79 of Mook Park Rise had this to say on the matter – “ I knew something was up when I woke to a very screechy version of I am the Walrus and then heard clanging noises. Well, it saves me doing it – I was saving up for a new set of alloys anyway..”

“This morning sees the end of a legal landmark trial in which a weasel named Magenta Bumgardener was cleared of contract fraud. Magenta was quoted as saying, “It’s not right that my species should be treated this way. Yes I know we are weasels, but that doesn’t mean we all try to get out of our responsibilities! It’s a very small minority of weasels that are like that and it’s not fair to blame the majority of honest, hard working weasels for their actions.” When asked if he would be returning to work, Mr. Bumgardener responded, “Umm… sure. Maybe. Yeah I mean obviously I’ll… oh look! Is that the queen?” When this reporter turned around again Mr. Bumgardener could be seen leaving in a taxi, the driver of which later stated that Mr. Bumgardener had not left him a tip.”